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gone but not forgotten (Read 2530 times)
megan
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gone but not forgotten
May 26th, 2005 at 11:49pm
 
  i lost my dog heidi a norweigian elkhound over a year ago but im still having trouble getting over her death.  every time i look at a picture of her i cry.  i got a new dog but i cant help but miss her, please help me cope with my dogs passing.
sincerely,
megan
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Laney
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Re: gone but not forgotten
Reply #1 - May 27th, 2005 at 1:13pm
 
You will never forget the time and the love you shared with Heidi.  You'll always have great memories, it does get easier as time passes you will continue to laugh, cry and smile everytime you think of your best friend. 
I lost my border collie Charlie 4yrs. ago this coming June 20th.  He is still in my heart and part of many conversations with those who knew him, I will charish every moment that I had with him for 131/2 years.  I am getting another border collie pup on in one week, his name will be Piper.  I can never replace Charlie nor would I try.  I will have new experiences with Piper.

Keep your memories strong
Tonia


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ketral
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Re: gone but not forgotten
Reply #2 - May 27th, 2005 at 3:52pm
 
This can be very hard....when they say its like losing a family member that couldn't be anymore true.  My "Buster" had to be put to sleep last year in February and not a day goes by that I don't think of him.  He had very severe allergies at the end and we could have kept taking care of each issue but it was to the point where they were coming one right after another....his hind-end, his paw, his eyes.  One day I looked at him and his eye was almost swollen shut and thought, this is it and 2 days later he was put to sleep.  I actually felt better when the vet said that he had been suffering and that yes, she agreed it was "his time"   because I wasn't sure if I was doing the right thing for him.  Whenever I get sad I think of him in doggie heaven and suffering no more pain and I'm just fine with that.  It would have been so selfish of me to not let go just because I didn't want to lose him.  It's not easy but time does heal.
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supergirl
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Re: gone but not forgotten
Reply #3 - May 30th, 2005 at 9:19pm
 
I  know  how  hard  it  is  to  lose  a  pet  you  loved  alot,  but  I  think  after  awhile  you  will  start  to  move  on.Dont  forget  he/orshe  will  always  be  in  your  heart.I'm  sure  your  new  dog  will  never  take  the  place  of  your  old  dog, but  dont  give  up  because  I'm  sure  he  knows  how you  feel  and  wants  to  be  there  for  you. Grin Cheesy Smiley Wink
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Animal Lover&&SuperGirl
 
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minniemous
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Re: gone but not forgotten
Reply #4 - Aug 28th, 2007 at 3:07am
 
i am very very sorry for your loss  i lost my dog about 3 weeks ago now i had to have her put down she was 11 y collie x lab she all of a sudden started having fits she was my baby i stayed with her at the vets i sat on the floor and had her laying on my lap it was horrible but nice at the same time that i was with her till the end i had her from a pup i was and still am devastated it is horrible what we have to do sometimes i still look at her chair where she used to sleep and think wheres hollie then i remember i have chosen a star for her my 2 year old everynight waves up to the sky at night and waves  and says night night hollie swwet dreams love you i do the same it makes me feel a bit better
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rufusbabo
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Re: gone but not forgotten
Reply #5 - Sep 2nd, 2007 at 4:11am
 
I recently lost my,BABO, August 10,2007. I have cried real tears not boohoo tears every day since. I've been traveling the web everyday looking for support groups to help me with this heartaching loss. Yesterday; I held his ashes for the first time since his death; I caressed the the package and cried to the point of not being able to drive...every empathetic response I hear is that it will take time...I'm still too fragile to truly believe. Cry Cry
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Tempest
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than another.

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Re: gone but not forgotten
Reply #6 - Sep 2nd, 2007 at 8:41am
 
Every person feels grief a little differently, and every death triggers a different grief response based on the relationship with the one who passed, the circumstances of the death, and our own experiences with death, grieving, and guilt.

The bottom line, though, is that there is no quick fix for grief.  We all just have to struggle through it however it comes.  For some folks, adopting another animal right away seems to help their healing.  For others (myself included), it is necessary to allow the heart to rest and recover before trying to bond with another needy soul.  Many years ago, I lost all three of my dogs and one of my horses within a six month period.  I completely shut down emotionally.  After losing the first two dogs, I adopted another as a buddy for the one who was still with me.  It was a mistake.  I simply wasn't ready or able to bond with a new animal at that time.  Sarah never got my best loving, even though she was part of my family for 16 yrs.  I gave her a good life, but not the best life that she deserved.

Now I am much more mindful of adopting a new animal too soon after the loss of another. I do, however, always have a houseful of animals.  Not only do they emotionally support each other when one passes on, but they do the same for me.  They are there patiently waiting for my heart to heal, loving me through the pain of loss, keeping me grounded and functioning in their daily care.  They are my grief support group (when necessary). The last time I only had one animal in my household was when I was seven.  I don't believe I will ever allow that situation to occur again.  It would just be too emotionally difficult to lose my only animal companion.

Grief serves an important purpose.  It reminds us of our priorities.  It focuses our attention on the importance of lessons learned.  Most critically, though, it cleanses us of pain.  It's not a quick process, but it is an effective one.  Allow grief to do its job.  Cry when you need to.  That is grief's way of purging the pain.  Dwell in your memories until you have absorbed the lessons they have to teach you.  That is where you will find the value of grief.

If, however, grief overwhelms your ability to function on a daily basis, seek professional counseling to help you through the process.  Grief should not be destructive.

I wish you all a peacful grief,

Tempest
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somanykitties
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Re: gone but not forgotten
Reply #7 - Sep 2nd, 2007 at 11:42am
 
Rufus, you will never get over your loss, you will cry even years after, but it will get easier as the days, months and years go by.  I still cry over my german shephard, Elsa, and she has been gone over 20 years.  Allow yourself to grieve, it will be ok, I promise.
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Within the heart of every stray...lies the singular desire to be loved
 
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rufusbabo
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Re: gone but not forgotten
Reply #8 - Sep 5th, 2007 at 3:13am
 
Thank you; for your kind words - Tempest and somanykitties.
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minniemous
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Re: gone but not forgotten
Reply #9 - Sep 10th, 2007 at 5:57am
 
hi sorry for your loss. i had a dog lucky when i was 6 years old i had to have him put down when i was 14 i am now 42 i still think about him all the time and i still get upset i even talk to him im not mad and i lost my hollie baby dog 3 aug 2007 she was my baby i have got her picture all over my pc wallpaper the lot i am always thinking about her me and my 2 kids wave upto the sky every night and wave and say night night hollie night night lucky it makes me feel a bit better it is true you will never ever forget but it can take ages but it does get much easier if you need to cry DO IT it makes me feel better it makes me feel better that when i am by myself i talk to hollie and lucky
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sandy2008
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Re: gone but not forgotten
Reply #10 - Oct 20th, 2008 at 3:30am
 
I  know  how  hard  it  is  to  lose  a  pet  you  loved  alot,  but  I  think  after  awhile  you  will  start  to  move  on.Dont  forget  he/orshe  will  always  be  in  your  heart.I'm  sure  your  new  dog  will  never  take  the  place  of  your  old  dog, but  dont  give  up  because  I'm  sure  he  knows  how you  feel  and  wants  to  be  there  for  you.
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Sweepsmamma
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Re: gone but not forgotten
Reply #11 - Oct 31st, 2008 at 8:02am
 
Awww Sweetheart you will never forget the love you shared, its so very hard right now to look back on all the fun things you shared. Im still having trouble getting to terms with loosing my darling Sweep my dog of nearly 16yrs.
My consolation is that one day we will be together again.

Your baby is now running about Rainbow Bridge happy and whole again.
God bless you and your baby hugs Sweepsmamma Maureen
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